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Willora is a sacred hidden place that is located in a remote area on Earth. No humans are yet aware of its presence. It was not originally a place on Earth, but a small planet far from it. The Langurhali did not yet exist, only a massive alien willow tree and a few unknown creatures.

The planet was an absolute good, harmonious and perfect in its environment, with creatures that coexisted together and knew nothing of violence or danger. There was never any bad weather and no carnivores to speak of. Willora was efficient, flourishing, peaceful, and far ahead of Earth, while also being very similar to the very beginning of its existence. Though, unlike Earth, its creatures only grew more intelligent and aware of the importance of selflessness, preservation and peace.

The Willow was the first plant to grow on this planet, and thus was the oldest, largest and strongest tree. Its giant star is said to have provided a kind of energy that cannot be found on Earth; a kind of life energy which gives the oldest and thus most hardy vessels the ability to absorb life energy and store it for a certain amount of time. Smaller vessels, such as an old stone or ancient pond may have the ability to store the energies of the dead which die close by to it. This sort of thing may sound like magic, but it took place on Willora every day and was a very logical, scientifically feasible way of life to the creatures there. The Willow had absorbed hundreds of thousands of "spirits" in the time it spent on Willora, as many creatures took refuge under its enormous branches and roots and lived out their very long lives under its canopy. Powerful vessels such as the giant Willow also have the ability to gather energy from living creatures; in such small amounts that the living things aren't even affected by it in the slightest. But after centuries of time... the Willow gained so much power that it was capable of almost anything.

The tree's roots dug deep into the soil of Willora until the small planet was almost composed more of roots than dirt. Miles from where the Willow grew, its roots came up in different places, growing many different types of plants and trees from them. Animals dug tunnels in the roots and built huge colonies and civilizations there where they evolved to have superior night vision and the ability to sense vibrations in the roots. Despite there being no carnivores, this served them well to know where others of their kind were if they lost their way in the massive and complex underground system in the roots. Each part of the tree was like a completely different environment... the highest branches housed dozens of different species of monkey-like creatures and avian things, the lower roots which stuck out from the ground served as shelter for amphibians as huge ponds would form from the indentations in branches the width of a small field. Crystal clear rivers dug trenches into other branches and roots which grew tightly together to form mountainous regions where you could hear the water pouring down the wood and leaves days after a heavy rainfall where they would finally plummet to the ground. Fungus-y, swampy areas grew where the Willow cast the most shadows and the sun rarely hit. Its roots grew a kind of symbiotic glowing slime mold so that underground-living creatures could see down their tunnels.

The Willow was the only piece of life to survive the freeze when the planet's old and giant, life-giving star finally flickered out. And because of the Willow being so immensely large and powerful, and by this point, an incredibly wise, old, sentient being... it absorbed all of the energy leaving none for other parts of the planet, and thus was the only part to survive when the star died and the planet froze. Bit by bit, the planet broke away from the Willow's roots as it floated alone through space in search of a new home. Its bark and branches hardened and petrified, the precious energy from its planet stored deep inside the heart of the tree where they would be safe and wouldn't fade for centuries to come, giving the tree time to find another suitable planet. The only planet that had a similar environment to Willora was Earth... as the Willow hesitantly landed there, sensing the evil that also dwelt here. The Willow was aware of the most remote location to land in... a place uninhabited by the most dangerous creatures known as humans. The tree landed and dug its roots into the Earth, and absorbed just enough of its energies to be able to read its memories. The tree was now so strong it could see the history of the planet by absorbing even the tiniest fragments of life from Earth, as its first taste of it was a massive feline which had just been hunted by a strange carnivore nearby. The energy was strong but frightening to the Willow; it had never sensed such an unpleasant death as most all of the deaths on Willora were peaceful and due to old age. The Willow wept for days, its roots contracting and swelling the Earth, creating a swampy area within itself, the Forgotten Forest. This place was unknown to the Willow after its creation, as the Willow's roots died beneath and separated from it. It hid behind the incredible height of the Canopies, a lofty forest for creatures to dwell in its treetops. Many forests, jungles, deserts and swamplands were created and remembered by the Willow as its roots connected to every other part around it, though from the outside, would appear as an empty section of land that would likely never be discovered.

The Willow did have a kind of consciousness beyond just absorbed memories and history, and though it was nothing more than a big old tree on the advanced planet of Willora, on Earth, the tree would have been a god. But the Willow did not want to be found by these people or any other creature on Earth. The tree decided it would set up this new version of its beautiful home planet... a small piece of the world from which it came, to bless the dying Earth with a fraction of Heaven where its creatures could reside once more. In a matter of a few years, the Willow released a portion of its energy into the Earth, causing a rapid evolution from cell to small microscopic life to small creatures and large creatures, lastly being the Langurhali, a species of which the tree could not have created without having so many years in space to build up its strength. Species by species, one by one, the Willorian creatures were born again as the tree gave back all the energy it took. They were all educated of the new world in which they lived and warned of this new thing called evil, and danger, and to never leave the boundaries of the new Willora that the tree had created.

The Langurhali flourished and made do with the soil of Earth, planting gardens and rebuilding their world on the less nutritious, but slowly growing world around them. The Langurhali were born with memories of their former planet, though they hadn't lived there in this physical form, they were the embodiment of all the creatures that lived there before. The tree's roots cautiously dug through the soil miles from its base until it began to sense the dangers of the outside world in the tips. These points of caution were where the tree set its boundaries, able to sense a human from miles away. If human territory grew too close or if even a single human did, the tree would retract and set up a new, massive mountain, dangerous forest or jungle from the Earth's species of plants that the human(s) would either become lost in or have to turn and go back away from. If the persistent human continued on, the Willow would expend extra energy to cause it to become lost and disillusioned by its pointless journey.

Everything was going perfectly, the only differences being that the Willow was more adept to the need to protect its surrounding creatures, and that the count of the creatures dropped drastically from thousands to hundreds. The Willow kept this number still on purpose to prevent overcrowding, though it could have easily created every last creature that ever existed on Willora, it knew to keep the numbers small and reserve the energy for in case it might need it to protect its small, but very important little world. For without the creatures living and breathing and creating more energy by living, the tree would slowly die; the energy stored slowly fading away without some physical being to inhabit and grow inside of. Not only did the tree need them, but it learned that after seeing the majority of the rest of the universe, there was no other place like Willora, however small, it was the most beautiful and heavenly place in the world, and it was absolutely crucial to the tree that it never completely die. For one day, it may inspire a dying world to improve itself and grow. The Willow began its journey trying to find a way to survive for itself, but ended it with the realization that, despite its godly power, its life was not the most important thing to it.

Although the new Willora was safe and growing, the Willow constantly battled the evils of the outside world... pushing back any carnivores or other Earthly creatures and wildlife in an effort to keep the new Willora as pristine and precise to itself as possible, only with the new intelligent species to help take care of it. Eventually, Willora was surrounded by near-impenetrable forests, lakes, rivers, mountains, swamps and jungles, and was almost becoming its own island due to the vast rivers pulled inland from the ocean around it. Luckily, no humans traveled much over this area or they would begin to see this part of the Earth reforming and secluding itself. This was not the only fear of the Willow. The spirits of the Langurhali were different after being reborn on Earth... being born from the roots of the Willow as they were growing through the negative energies of this planet caused them to be born with physical deformities as well as a slightly, but unnervingly different kind of spirit energy that could be sensed by the highly intuitive Willow. The Langurhali had the ability to become frustrated, angry, even sneaky. The children of the species showed this in their methods of play and the adults showed it in the way they interacted with each other, through subtle manipulation and dishonesty. It was rare among the Langurhali and they were still vastly more honest and pure than the humans, but to the Willow, this was a sure sign of the negativity of the Earth slowly affecting them. The Willow had only spent about .5% of its energy recreating a portion of Willora and setting up boundaries... and as long as life carried on as it did on Willora, with all the creatures being born and dying nearby, the Willow would have enough strength to keep the positive energy of Willora alive for as long as the Earth itself lasted. But as powerful as the Willow was, the Earth's energy could very well damage it if it were allowed to come into its territory beyond the inkling that was born in the Langurhali.

The Willow wanted the creatures of the new Willora to have free will and to venture wherever they wished... but not without warning of the risks involved. There was one Langurhali, Septymus, who had the utmost curiosity about the outside world, above all the others... he would venture to the outskirts of Willora, investigating the plant life and observing the creatures. He grew especially fond of the carnivores and their brutal way of life. A fox eating a mole was as terrifying to a Langurhali or any other Willorian creature as a human slaughtering another human, to us. This sort of nature was completely unfamiliar to the intuitive Langurhali, especially... who had the most of the Willow inside of them than any other creature. They had its consciousness, its intelligence and its sense for evil. Though to us, a carnivore eating its prey is not evil, to a Willorian, it's the most unimaginable display of violence that, to them, is unnecessary and impossible to understand how any life forms could evolve to only be able to thrive by slaughtering other creatures. Septymus was disgusted, horrified and yet intrigued by this "evil", he made himself immune to it slowly by observing the outside creatures. From a small carnivore feeding, to avian creatures tearing the remains apart, to the way the corpse would rot into the soil rather than be absorbed in a wave of energy like on Willora. The stench of death, the sight of something decaying, the sound of a tree dying and falling to the ground, not to be absorbed but to slowly mold and become inhabited by termites and rodents and snakes. He learned about the Earth and all its parasites and selfishness, and it filled his mind with its ways.

The Langurhali are so in tune with their advanced natural world that they instinctively understand everything about Earth's science without having to learn it from books. They can tell you how to make a medicine without ever knowing disease or anything about Earth's herbs. Their sense for the world around them and the materials in which everything is composed is astounding. Septymus was particularly fond of learning all the new composites of Earth first-hand, from the mildew of a stagnant pond to the way that creatures are formed inside... Septymus wanted to be like the Earth creatures. He wanted their power, their abilities, their fangs, claws and even their crude and rather primitive digestive system. Their bodies don't even absorb all the energy they take in; their intestines filter out only some of the nutrients, then waste is produced. The Langurhali never needed to expel waste, as Willora's fruit, vegetables and fungi were filled only with what they need and their bodies were optimized to use everything it absorbed. Septymus didn't have the same faith in the Willow as the others. He thought they should learn to fend for themselves and live without the Willow's power, as if anything ever happened to the Willow, the Langurhali would be left to fend for themselves and would otherwise have no idea how to thrive.

As Septymus spent his life away from the Willow's influence, his body began to adapt and mutate to that of an Earthly creature. The Langurhali were made to adapt to their surroundings rapidly, and Septymus adored his new life of eating meat, having extra organs which processed food and liquids differently, and all the new types of pain to endure. The Earth's excessive gravity made life more challenging as well, making him stronger. He was amused by humans giving birth to a more developed child of which is born with a gender and expected to behave according to it. These humans and these other Earth creatures were so alien, so unique, so primitive, so confusing, inefficient and nonsensical, but with a much more challenging and exciting life with dangers and painful events in every aspect of their lives. Every day must be such a blessing when you have to fight so hard for it, he thought. He was envious of them... however unknowing, unintuitive, unintelligent, clumsy, filthy. He wanted to create something with a combination of these traits and the Willorian's, something smart but powerful, and not having to know so much about the universe that their existence seemed pointless and hopeless. Being a Willorian made every day feel like a pointless struggle in that there was no struggle at all. Septymus eventually became so human that he learned such emotions as hopelessness, lust, greed, carelessness and even hate. The more he exposed himself to this new world, the more he wanted for himself and the more human he became. His idea was to create a species that could take on the appearance and abilities of these creatures while retaining enough of the Willow's intelligence to be ultimate survivors. He wanted nothing more than to capture what he believed to be their evil essence which gave them the ability to be sneaky, crafty, selfish, murderous things... and to combine that with the power and endurance of the Willorian species, so that they wouldn't live in fear of the terrible, wicked Earth creatures, but would be able to conquer them.


The Willow could sense this evil plan growing in Septymus, but knew there was little it could do to stop him. Even with all the power of an entire planet and the energies of many millennia worth of life forces within it... much like the humans' idea of god, the Willow was an ultimate good and incapable of inflicting harm onto another being or of even altering its state of mind after it had already been born from its roots. Warning Septymus, and protecting as many of the good creatures left within its boundaries as possible was the only thing the tree would be capable of doing against such a vile concept as merging one of Willora's kind with one of Earth's. However, Septymus was no longer welcomed in the land of new Willora, as his deceptive and dangerous energies could cause terrible things on the other creatures if it were exposed to him for too long, and this was especially made evident when he stole a root from the Willow and crawled into a dark cave within the depths of dark jagged mountains on the outskirts of Willora in a useless effort to hide from the Willow. His intentions were unknown to the Willow, as they were unknown even to Septymus... all he knew was that he would need the Willow's power if he were to fulfill his ambition. And so he was cast out, living in the part of Willora created from the Willow's sorrow; Forgotten Forest.

Septymus built something himself in the forest; a giant hidden castle tucked between the fissile, shale-like shards vertically split into thin mountains throughout it. It was made to resemble the sharp, black peaks so that it could never be found. But he didn't do this by himself... he stabbed the Willow root into the moldy soil and used his now emphasized ability to create. He made an army of even more deformed hybridized mutant creatures than the Langurhali to help him. They were called the Pravusali. Twisted, furless, wrinkled, dry flesh stretched over bones as jagged as the mountains. Deep, dark eyes deprived of vitamins from the sun and atrophied limbs wobbling upon bony, massive animal feet ending in cracked and dirty claws. Being the holder of such power, they obeyed him without thought or a consciousness of their own. With the power of the Willow root, though only a small fraction of the Willow itself, he could create twelve more armies... but he chose to keep the powers for a later time and took some of the members of his army into his newly built laboratory to dissect and learn from their anatomy, so he could figure out a way to create them on his own, and perhaps improve upon his methods. After many failed attempts, he finally created a species of monstrosities which were powerful, as well as intelligent. He called them Pralavusali, the first attempts considered duds, too weak and clumsy for his liking, and retained too much of the Willow's good energies. Even if they were easily convinced to fight, they were pathetic and had no lust for power, they were simply obedient dogs to Septymus. He decided to use them as slaves working in the shadows. He commanded them to build onto his castle, though many simply died under the weight of the rocks they were forced to burden along dark winding paths. As his attention was focused on his new, more powerful creation, the Pravusali began to have thoughts of their own. They continuously tried to escape, though they knew no other world than this even existed. So he locked them in the dungeon to die.

The Pravusali were somewhat powerful, but also rather weak to inevitable things like sunlight and excessive heat. They required a more humid, but cold environment that would be dark and shaded, and so they finally escaped deeper into the Forgotten Forest. The Forgotten Forest lived up to its name as being a place where most things could never navigate through. Its depressive energies also cause a feeling of hopelessness. The Pravusali expelled the same negative energy as Septymus, though to a much more muted degree, still having a tremendous impact on most Willorians being filled with Septymus' creations combined with the Forgotten Forest itself, its entire existence inspired by sorrow. Meanwhile, his castle grows even more twisted, black and ugly as his polluted mind used the Willow root and poisoned it with his morbidity and insanity. The Willow root was turned into something he called the Staff of Putria, named after one of his favorite Pralavusali creations.

He desired her, and eventually fell into what he thought was love with her... though his black heart grew progressively more incapable of such feeling. She found him repulsive as he was weak and resembled Langurhali too much for her liking, and so he concocted an idea for something monstrous for himself to become, and as he held the Staff of Putria and closed his eyes, he envisioned himself as the most hideous and powerful Pralavusali. His bones cracked and twisted. The root created things in the blink of an eye and without flaw or error, but the staff, a now evil and flawed creation unto itself, created things messily and morbidly, and for living things, the transformation or birth can be maddeningly painful. The misery he felt for the few instances it took for his body to misshapen and mold to his most disgusting thought, pushed him over the edge of insanity and he became more a monster than he ever was as a Langurhali.

He succeeded at captivating Putria as she fell in lust with his new form and mind. She and Septymus worked together to train the Pralavusali to become more powerful and created a bigger army to eventually try to storm through Willora and take over the tree and its power, in hopes to eventually conquer Earth and make it their own morbid paradise. Septymus left the weaker Pravusali to the Forgotten Forest, convincing most of them to serve as scouts to inform him of the goings-on of Willora, as they are the only ones able to navigate through the Forest and their sleek, thin, frail bodies are perfect for sneaking around the perimeter and trying to find points of vulnerability. The Pravusali also have just enough of the Willow inside them that they are harder for the Willow to sense than the completely wicked and evil Pralavusali.

Septymus, being so busy with creating monsters and his plans and dreams of becoming a god and enslaving mankind, has forgotten about the Pravusali and after a while, the Pralavusali stop bringing them food and medications. Though they may be somewhat good, they have just enough of the evil doctor Septymus' thoughts in them to have characteristics of Earth creatures such as disease, illness and other health problems that may cause them to die at a very early age. They have vulnerabilities to illness and injury, and, though much more powerful and with a much longer lifespan than humans, they die quicker than the Langurhali and have many imperfections by comparison. They require things which the Willow could provide them. They, unlike the Pralavusali, have a strong sense of the Willow and are able to feel its thoughts, and they are drawn to it, as being part of the Willow itself, having part of the Willow root inside them before it turned into the Staff of Putria. The Willow calls out to these energy fragments from its root with the desire to be complete again. The remaining enslaved Pravusali, which were kept in a more barred-down area of the castle for observation and testing, become desperate for a way out of the dungeon and away from the Septymus Mountains, and finally they find a way out. During the construction of the dungeon, the Pravusali remembered that part of the wall was vulnerable as it was built with soil caked in the concrete-like mixture they had created to build the walls. Slowly, they began scraping away at the wall with claw and horn until they could empty the soil out from the bricks and pound their way through the other side. It took several years, and many of the larger, older males sacrificed their horns, wearing them down on the wall. One Pravusali female had even given birth while in the dungeon. They had never seen one of their own young before. Having part of the goodness of the Willow in them, it gave them the ability to reproduce, unlike the Pralavusali, which have to be re-created as their bodies wear out (within only 10-20 years, which means if Septymus or his predecessors die, the Pralavusali would cease to exist in no time). It was the first Pravusali to be born... a sparkle of hope to the others as they now knew they were able to flourish and survive if only they could find the Willow, something they'd never seen but knew was the answer to all their problems and a safe place to call home. As their biology struggled to exist, it evolved to give birth much faster than the Langurhali as their genetics try and save the species. They die sooner than the Langurhali, living only about 100 years if they manage to dodge all the disease and injury they are so susceptible to.

The Pravusali escaped almost effortlessly once the wall weakened, as the castle was so enormous the pounding couldn't be heard from the upper quarters where the Pralavusali resided. The Willow had built a wall out of its roots to separate itself from the Forgotten Forest, and they were also surrounded in vines and plant life from its roots; impossible to destroy or break through if you had a speck of evil within you. The Pravusali climbed over it, proving their own fears of being anything like the Pralavusali wrong. Stepping onto the soil gave them what felt like memories of a place they'd never seen or touched. They felt at one with the Willow, as they were all one consciousness, while being separate minds and personalities.

The escapees were still not quite ready to live in Willora and retreated to the Forgotten Forest as the air around the Willow was far too rich, dry and clean for their lungs, and the sun far too bright and hot. They met up with the other Pravusali, which had given birth to many other young for the lonely newborn to play with. Though mostly good, the Pravusali were still creations of Septymus, and they were meant for the cold, moist, moldy environment of the Forgotten Forest. Some of the Pravusali which had lived outside the mountains for years had learned how to create their own healing implements, and helped the new Pravusali heal. The set of escapees from Septymus' own laboratory were riddled with scars and other permanent horrible flaws to constantly remind them of the torment they endured. The Langurhali never knew of their existence, but the Pravusali knew of the Langurhali, and so they began to prepare for the inevitable battle to save Willora from Septymus while living out a happy (or happier) existence near the Willow. The Pravusali were too afraid that the Langurhali would not accept them. As the Willow grew to understand the way the Earth works, it began to understand the energy it was expending to shield the Willorians from Earth's more intense weather, and began to realize it would have to condition the Willorians to grow to tolerate it. Slowly, the Willow allowed the Langurhali to experience extreme cold, heat, wind and rain. The Langurhali grew to realize the necessity for houses and shelters. They learned how to build these... many within the Willow itself. Where the original Willorian creatures built nests in the Willow just to be close to it, the Langurhali now needed its shelter. They also needed sleep, which was actually beneficial to the Willow as it meant it could absorb the Langurhali's energies as they slept, and it would actually help benefit the Langurhali as they could rest soundly and more deeply.

They also learned many methods of fighting and self-defense, for there were now many more dangers surrounding them than at old Willora. The Willow learned these things from the memories of people it would absorb in the Earth. The Willow taught the Langurhali all the necessary tools for survival and all the ways throughout history that humans have harmed their world due to flawed judgments and ignorance, in hopes to create a world for them on Earth without repeating any of these mistakes, as people started much the same as the Willorians since arriving on Earth. Septymus once turned his back on Willora for not helping the Langurhali to survive without it, but in finally doing so, the Willow & Willorians hold the key to destroying Septymus and his army.


Other random facts:
-  Vera was one of the last Willow-created Langurhali, aka Elders. There are around 20 Elders. These original Langurhali were created as adults and did not experience a childhood, and to cope with this, many of them may be found playing or creating a childhood for themselves every now and again. They are great with children for this reason.

- Eating anything grown from Earth outside Willora could make Langurhali sick (they eat plantlife created by the Willow), but Pralavusali more energized due to the negative energies and how they can be weaknesses or points of strength depending on the species and how they were created.

- "Willorian" does not just mean Langurhali; it encompasses all other creatures within the Willow's reach, including Earth-like ungulates, reptiles, fish, animals resembling man-made mythological creatures, etc.

- Septymus continues to experiment with Earth creatures, making non-anthropomorphic monstrous creatures using his own scientific knowledge to inhabit his castle and the Mountains, only using the Staff of Putria in moderation.

- The Willow could have points of vulnerability by needing to sleep for a certain amount of time every few years. This is a dangerous point where Septymus could send out some of his Pralavusali to destroy the tree or capture Langurhali to learn from them and gain their powers of being able to approach the Willow, and learn from it.

- Though they relate more to Earth creatures than the Langurhali, the Pralavusali and Pravusali don't know as much as the Langurhali about the humans or the outside world as they don't have the intuitive ability to absorb memories or hear the Willow's voice. They only know what they've experienced themselves.

- Pravusali aren't as evil as Pralavusali, which is why some of them could be not so evil or vulnerable to becoming good through the Willow's powers. The Willow can't alter a creature's mind or heart but it can take what good is in a creature, and strengthen it. If the Pravusali were to venture near the Langurhali, the Langurhali would likely accept them, help them and teach them, but because the Pravusali can't comprehend such kindness, they are afraid to leave the Forgotten Forest.

- The Elders are the most skilled scientists in Willora. Vera learned many things from Septymus while he was still a Langurhali. Like how to create things on her own, as well as how to transform herself into a Pravusali, change her own shape or do practically anything to modify her own body, including separate parts of herself from her body for short periods of time, such as her limbs or head, become a plushie, or take on traits of another species. She was the only one of the elders who wasn't afraid of the dark magic, and the only existing creature who knows it, but doesn't use it for evil.

- The Elders hold a staff known as the Staff of Sight, or "S.O.S." as it has been nicknamed, as it is helpful in finding points of Septymus' dark magic around the new Willora. It is made from part of the Willow's roots as well, and has been blessed so that it is invincible to corruption. It also assists Vera in her 'mad science' creations, things that not even the Willow could create as it does not have part of the Earth's energy inside it - it can only use Earth energy to learn and read things, not to absorb and become a part of it. Most of the Elders disagree with her practices, but allow her to continue as many of her creations help protect the Willow. Vera was created with part of the Earth, and so she has the ability to create things resembling Earth's flora and fauna. She's also able to give herself horns made of the Willow's branches when she is in her Pravusali form. She has a heightened sense of the Willow in this form, and they protect her when in the presence of Septymus' evil.

Thank you for enjoying and respecting my species :)
Add a Comment:
sanura-mosi Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2009  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
First some overall comments i had.

Good logic for the original energy absorption, I think its close enough to how plants themselves get energy, that this is entirely plausible, and adds a note of realism.

Now I'll quote the sentences I have comments on and include my comments:

"they all exist somewhere in the universe and the only knowledge people have of them is the sense all people are born with, a sort of spiritual sense of the universe that lets us all know that something is there without actually seeing, hearing or otherwise sensing it with our more common senses."
I LOVE the concept used here! It taps into a sense of unseen things that I personally believe everyone has, but some people- such as most adults- have lost their sense of. Its a wonderful start to introduce some of your other concepts.

"Human children not only are innocent and with a stronger spiritual sense to believe they actually exist, but also... though it's a sad fact otherwise... adults never believe anything children say about magic or the "illogical"."
This needs to be looked at and reworded, some of the phrasing is awkward, and after the fact you may find a better way to say this.

"Willora was not much farther from Earth than Pluto and not much smaller, and a couple other smaller, uninhabitable planets revolved with it around the small sun."
This is a bit confusing to read, so you may want to rework or reword it so it reads much more simply. You're telling us a simple concept, just look at these sentences about the position of Willora and see if you can combine them to make more sense.

"After they finished building onto his castle and trying to turn them into slaves in it didn't work as they continuously tried to foil his plans and escape, he locked them in the dungeon to die."
AND it didn't work

"The Pravusali also have just enough of the Willow inside them that they are harder for the Willow to sense than the completely wicked and evil Pravalusali.
"The Langurhali escaped almost effortlessly, as the castle was so enormous the pounding couldn't be heard from the upper quarters where the Pravalusali and Septymus resided.
"After many failed attempts, he finally created a species of monstrosities which were powerful, as well as intelligent. He called them Pravalusali, the first two being Langurhali and Pravusali, each more horrible than the last. The Langurhali were too weak and clumsy for his liking, and retained too much of the Willow's good energies.
Your references to the Pravalusali and Pravusali are CONFUSING. Not only are the names REALLY close, but these are referring to two totally different groups in your world, and you DEFINITELY want to go back and check each use to make sure its the proper one, in the parts i sited above, they contradict what you said previously and make the whole thing confusing. Generally I could make sense of it, but its VERY hard when you accidentally use Pravalusali instead of Pravusali.

"They also learned many methods of fighting and self-defense, for there were now many more dangers surrounding them than at Willora. The Willow learned these things from the memories of people it would absorb in the Earth. The Willow taught the Langurhali and Dric all the necessary tools for survival and all the ways throughout history that humans have harmed their world due to flawed judgements and ignorance, in hopes to create a world for them on Earth without repeating any of these mistakes, as people started much the same as the Willorians have since arriving on Earth."
I like the idea of not making the something new and better but learning from the past mistakes- this is also another "doable" thing in your story/world, and adds yet another note of realism and common sense.

"She also holds a staff known as the Staff of Sight, or "S.O.S." as it has been nicknamed, as it is so helpful in finding points of Septymus' dark magic around New Willora. It is made from part of the Willow's roots as well and has been blessed so that it is invincible to being corrupt or poisoned with evil."
Out of curiosity, >^.^< who was it that blessed the staff?

My last comments are actually involved with the dream world i thought up and the powers of vera herself:
The dream world i created is a bizarre abstraction of the "real" world, and has some reflections of Willora in it.
" her Pravusali form. She has a heightened sense of magic in this form as well."
This magic actually excited me when i read this, as i think this makes it fully possible that she can interact with a dreamworld of Willora, and have the power to allow anyone she wants into it, and would explain very well the odd happenings and twisted elements, but lack of any pain.
I also have included something- the entry to the dream world, which has VERY twisted elements such as vore, and gore and such things that are normally painful, but without the pain- happens to be through your greatest fear.
In my story it starts out with my characters claustrophobia - she's locked into a chest and she's locked in it long enough to get past panic and just as she's about to lose her mind... she's magically let out into the dream world.

I've put a good bit of thought into the world, as well as how someone's personality traits leave sometimes bizarre marks on their person while in the world.

Please lemme know what you think of all this, if you like i can give you what i have so far to read over.
scythemantis Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2008  Hobbyist General Artist
Finished reading! You're a thoughtful world-builder. I remember the ooold story and notes on paper, I can tell a lot's been polished and expanded :)
MoonliteSymphony Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2008
I'll send a note with my extended thoughts on the history here. I'm also going to try and make a new picture of Meagan to go along.

Any objection to the blind ol' Meagan being an elder? I was thinking that if she was one of the first made she'd be less stable and thus here eyes eventually gave out over time. Or something along those lines.
the-burning-claw Featured By Owner Apr 25, 2008
Flexico Featured By Owner Apr 22, 2008  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Is there a journal that lists the members and their characters?
MutantCats Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2008
The members are listed here xD The characters are posted in the gallery, so I don't see much point making a journal just for that. :3
rabidboi Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2006  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I vote for another contest. I didn't get to participate in the last one. No scanner but I HAVE ONE NOW!
Ayama-Chan Featured By Owner Sep 20, 2006
Please may I join?
Charisma-Love Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2006
I'm thinking I probably need to change what I specified the length of Aleshanee's tail was (I wrote 9 foot I think). If the tails of langur hali are generally three times the length of their bodies, then it'll need to be increased to something like 18"! If you could change that for me that'd be great :)
Blattaphile Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2006
oh okies I'll get to that then! Have I posted Aleshanee in the gallery? If not can I do that? :)
Charisma-Love Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2006
Yeah sure :)
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Submitted on
November 27, 2008


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